Further contemplations over the future…though with remarkably less stress than before.
I have reached the point of no return – Fall semester has begun and I opted not to enroll in classes. Even though I merited a free ride, the academic stimuli at Lesley (in my field) is so lacking that I cannot stomach going back. The students are all bleeding hippies, and deep down, despite all my global awareness and animal-love, I abhor hippies and their sharing of feelings and big mouths. Victorian studies has no room for the dissection of my personal feelings, nor would I be inclined to share them with a room of pratty graduate students even if it did include personal analysis.
However, as my back-and-forth with my old professor (and mentor) picks up, and our discussions inevitably turn to post colonialism or Thompson versus Paine, I really do miss the relentless studying and writing. I feel stagnant right now, and though I have a lot going on with the opening of the new salon and the new training involved, it’s not really what I picture myself doing long-term. Which I makes me even more thankful that I have remained at Lesley as a part-time English tutor and have taken the job with my old professor has his research assistant.
Tomorrow I really need to call Kaplan and discuss when I can enroll in the GRE prep courses. Though I rarely end up performing poorly on tests I get such terrible anxiety I often make myself terribly sick. In a hope to avoid any unnecessary trips to the doctor’s office or the hospital (and they are unnecessary because they never have any answers) I am going to make myself feel good about the GREs before I take them. Maybe I will even look forward to taking them. So first step: sign up for Kaplan courses.
Second, I need to get in touch with the violin instructor and talk about taking weekly lessons now that I have my set schedule.
Third, I need to enroll in a gym. I find my physical exertion and mental wellness are often directly linked positively. Thus, the more I work out the better I feel. Also, the less often I am struck down with any of the ailments I suffer from. This makes both Matt and I happy, because I am not lying on the couch complaining that I am dying.
Finally – I need to determine what I want to do for graduate school. I have considered the following options:
MFA in Creative Writing
PhD in Victorian/Fin de Siecle Studies
MA in Journalism and Publishing
returning to school to receive a BS in Animal Health (ie: become a vet tech)
There is also the option of remaining in the beauty industry and eventually trying to get into a corporate job with Aveda – most likely in their global PR department. That wouldn’t require any more schooling, but I would be traveling around the world.
Decisions, decisions…
Jeremiah said,
September 11, 2008 at 7:16 pm
I’m surprised that, as staff or some shit, you wouldn’t have access to the gym at Leslie. Or do they not have a gym?
If you want to avoid hippies, you should avoid getting an MFA in creative writing. You could also join some Ron Paul club or something or become an Engineer. There’s an overwhelming number of Republican engineers. I dunno what it is – it’s the only “science” where they’re openly accepted. Like the opposite of physics. Chemists are in the middle, I think… nihilists, the most of us.
Remember not to dream but plan. Dreams aren’t meant to come true – plans are!
Jeremiah said,
September 11, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Also, I don’t see you in sales. Just an FYI.
DaBoo said,
September 23, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Personally, I think you’d do a hell of a job as a model. You could be a petite model or just a face model … either way you’d be a success. But I know that you wouldn’t be using that brilliant mind of yours and, thus, wouldn’t be happy … so probably not something you should look into. I have to say that I disagree with J’s comment about dreams not being meant to come true. Dreams can give you something to work toward. Sometimes you have to stray off the course of reality and let your mind wander a bit. I know you kids weren’t raised that way but I hate to see you being so serious all the time. Be spontaneous … cut up once in a while … laugh … smile … and plain and simply have fun. As you do those things you’ll find yourself being more creative in ways that you haven’t been before. That’s where the dreams come in. When you feel good just dreaming about what you want to be “when you grow up” … it might make you wonder if fulfilling your dreams can make you feel that way all the time. Life isn’t all about how much money you’re going to have in your pocket or the house you live in or the car you drive … it’s all about what you put into your journey. Maybe it’s just this “mentalpause” thing that your uncle seems to think I’m going thru … but I find the older I get the more I realize how much time I’ve wasted when I wasn’t having fun and enjoying my life. So dream a little and see if it takes you anywhere that gives you new insight!
Love you much my little Goofy Grape! (Remember that?)